bsumone | ❝ Nobody knows where you’re going ❞

"In this house? I'd say around five years now. Being here means I can be close to my mother and she can easily walk over to see me when she wants or I can visit her to help her with upkeep at her home."

Nodding to the bag, he brought the hand he held up to his lips. Then he smiled warmly at him. "Dal, I want you to feel free to tell me whenever you want things. This really is your home now and you should have things you love here just like I do. We'll make this somewhere that represents us both."

For a moment that stretched a little too long, Dal just looked at the bag. His entire life fit in it. That’s how small and unimportant he was. It truly didn’t bother him. Dal never wanted to be some impressive, important person. He was important to Gabriel, the man who loved him, and that was more than enough to satisfy him.

But staring at the duffel back left him feeling… a little melancholy. Even his life before coming to the US had been small. He stayed in his room mostly, to avoid the distance of his parents on the rare times they were home. They left him alone, raised by nannies and tutors. Every material need met, with nothing but a void where familial love should’ve been.

His eyes went distant and he squeezed Gabriel’s hand a little tighter. “… I used to like plushes,” he murmured in a small voice. “Has about six of ‘em on my bed ‘til dad saw ‘em.” No son of mine will collect this girlish trash. And off they went, directly down the trash chute before Dal could save any of them. He blinked away the wetness in his eyes before he looked back at Gabriel.

“Could I get one? Just one, I promise!”

That was the look of someone who was still being hurt by something from years ago. Pulling him close, Gabriel cupped his face so he could look right into those beautiful dark eyes. Such a small request broke his heart but he still made sure to smile at his boyfriend.

"Dal, you can have as many as you want. If you love plushes then I will build you places to store them. We can cover this entire room and our bed and even the rest of the house in them if it will make you smile."

Because it was so small a thing. To just want to have plush toys to collect and hold.

Dal sniffled but beamed up at Gabriel. He took note of the smallest things since the start: like Dal not eating breadcrust. He took note of them and made them important. He made Dal feel important. The smile lasted only seconds before he wrapped his arms around Gabriel’s waist and pressed his face against his chest.

Dal always liked cute things. Little cushions shaped like flowers, a dumpling nightlight, adorable kitchenware, all of that sort of stuff. All little luxuries he hadn’t considered for the better part of the last decade. Why bother with cute things when he could end up booted out of his apartment at any time? They would just be things to be stolen or sold.

But now? Now he could consider them again. He could have a cute coffee mug in the kitchen, an adorable rice bowl, chopsticks with pawprints on them. A room – a whole room! – full of plushes!

Dal laughed against Gabriel’s chest, then tilted his head back to look up at him. “But we need room for the sugar gliders.”

Edited (typo) 2023-07-02 22:38 (UTC)

"There will be room. I promise."

Cupping Dal's face when he was looking up at him again, he pressed a soft kiss to his lips. "If there's room for my reading habits then there's room for the gliders and the cute things you love."

Because it wouldn't be fair for them to not allow Dal to have everything that he loved when Gabriel already had so much of the things he loved here. And if people didn't like the combination of them both there? They weren't welcome in this home anymore. This was a safe place.

For both of them.

Less than a day here and Dal already felt like a different person. Oh, it will take some time for him to shake some of the habits and instincts he formed over the last eight years, some even before that. But he already felt like it was safe to hope. IT was safe to dream, safe to decorate his world however he wanted to without fear of someone telling him it’s wrong or inappropriate.

Gabriel offered him everything he ever wanted. Love, acceptance, affection, safety. Dal no longer had to temper himself to survive. He didn’t have to be afraid of hoping, of thinking of the future, of wanting more than what he had. That was freeing. In return, Dal wanted to give the same to his boyfriend. He wanted to make his life more comfortable however he could.

Burying his face once more against Gabriel’s chest, he stayed close to that solid frame that always reminded him of safety.

“My parents hated all that stuff. No pets, they didn’t like me drawin’, or collectin’ cute stuff.” Basically, he’s never really been able to be himself fully since he was a very young child. “Thank you for lettin’ me have it.”

Gabriel gently stroked his hair and shook his head before pushing him back to have him sit on the bed. There he knelt in front of him and took his hands. Smiling up at him, he rubbed the backs with his thumbs.

"I'm not letting you do anything. I do not control your life. Instead allow me to thank you for wanting to share what matters to you with me. That is so precious and I'm honored that you want to do that."

Bringing those hands to his lips, he kissed the backs then smiled up at him again. "Your parents hurt you badly but you're safe here. To be exactly who you are and who you want to be."

Dal let himself be guided to the bed and, after Gabriel kissed his hands, he pulled them free to cup his face. His life wasn’t easy, between his family situation and everything after he ran away. Dal never really felt like he could simply be himself, indulge his interests without fear of disdain or outright hostility. And here’s Gabriel encouraging it, embracing the things he likes.

“I know ya can guess a lot about them already… someday I’ll tell ya everythin’. But not now. I’m so happy bein’ here. I don’t wanna let go of that feelin’ just yet.”

"Take all the time that you need, Dal. I'll listen when you are ready to tell me about them."

And he wouldn't push him to tell him sooner. Dal needed to have the space to come into this on his own and he respected that fact. So he gave him a warm smile and kissed his hands again.

"By the way, I want to learn how to do things for you. Like take care of your hair or how you do your makeup. That way if you don't ever feel up to it I can help you with it. Will you teach me these things?"

Dal blinked a few times. Every sweet gesture Gabriel made took him by surprise. And every one of those gestures made him feel like he was falling in love all over again. Everything Gabriel said and did made Dal feel safe and respected. He smiled, the look subtle except for the way his eyes lit up.

“Hmm… Will ya teach me things in return?”

That made the man laugh and he nodded without hesitation. The look on his face was bright and adoring. Teach Dal some things? Oh he'd absolutely love to do that. Just as much as he'd love learning things from him.

"Anything you want to know. I'd love to teach you things."

“Okay,” he agreed with a series of nods. If Gabriel was willing to let Dal learn from him – even if he wasn’t, really – he’d be happy to show Gabriel things he could help him with from time to time. Knowing that Gabriel wanted to be able to take care of things like that for him made warmth spread through his chest.

“I can show ya now if ya want. I gotta get ready to meet your mom.”

"Thank you. Your bag is over there." He pointed it out then got out of the way so that way Dal could get it. Already he was staying close without getting in the way to learn how his new boyfriend got ready. There wasn't a lot about this, he knew after all. It wasn't something he'd ever had an interest in before. Or an interest of any of his past boyfriends.

Dal followed where Gabriel indicated, getting up to sort through the duffel bag for what he needed. It took him a few trips to carry his various toiletries to the bathroom: the usual things plus his myriad of skincare products on top of that. It was his goal going forward to try to take good care of his hair like he always has his skin. Maybe he should stop lightening it for a while… maybe. He never really liked it dark.

Once that was done, he dug around for something that didn’t scream ‘street walker.’ That ended up being a pair of too-big jeans and the sole button-up shirt he owned with a light blue sweater that would go over it. He laid each garment out neatly and set a pair of balled up socks beside them.

Looking back to Gabriel, Dal lifted his brows in curiosity. “Gonna shower with me?” He wasn’t sure if Gabriel was inclined to bathe again, but Dal wanted him to know he was welcome if wanted to.

"If you'd like me to."

After all, he was clean. But more than that? He wasn't going to push Dal to do anything he didn't feel comfortable with. If he wanted him in there with him though? Well then he'd be more than happy to join him. Showering together as a couple? It gave him a warm feeling in his heart.

“I do like,” he affirmed with a certain little nod. It was only fair since he only barely remembered last night when they actually bathed together. He wanted that memory of their first time bathing as a couple, but he’ll have to settle for the memory of their second time, instead. It couldn’t be helped.

Dal smiled as he reached out for Gabriel’s hands, leading him off to the bathroom as if he didn’t know where it was in his own house. It was hard to believe this was his home, now, too. That thought warmed him and caused him to wiggle a little as he trotted off with Gabriel in tow.

Laughing softly, he let himself be led to the bathroom. It was his own home, yes, but he loved having Dal so comfortable he would do this. When they got to the bathroom, he took his glasses off first before starting the water for the shower to let it heat up. Then he moved over to Dal.

"May I help you get undressed?" he asked while staying out of his personal space until Dal gave his answer. Just to make it clear that his boyfriend would never have to do anything he didn't want to do.

“Mnhmm.” Dal nodded, too, and moved closer so he could be the one to move into Gabriel’s personal space. He adored how respectful Gabriel’s always been. How he asked permission and didn’t assume that, even now that they’re a couple, certain liberties could be taken. Eventually, a time would come when neither of them would need to ask about things like small affections. But Dal’s secretly (or not so secretly) elated that Gabriel treats him this way.

“Can I help, too?”

"You can."

Reaching out now, he took the edges of Dal's shirt (his actually) to pull it up and off of him. Letting it fall, he smiled warmly at him, not letting his eyes linger on the bruising still there. He knew about them and he knew that what his boyfriend needed the most now was time to heal rather than him getting angry over what would become just the past.

Before Dal got to his clothes though, Gabriel knelt down to help him out of the pants next. All so he could lean on his shoulders for balance while he stepped out of them.

Dal did rest a hand on Gabriel’s shoulder as he stepped out of the pants. He pointedly avoided glancing in the mirror, opting instead to keep his eyes on Gabriel. He knew there had to be more bruises that he hadn’t seen yet just from the aches they left. Right now, he didn’t care to see them. It wasn’t like he could remember where they came from clearly anyway. What point would there be in letting himself be upset by the sight of them?

When Gabriel was back on his feet, Dal took his turn to undress his boyfriend (ah, just thinking of him that way sent a rush of happiness through him!). He’s undressed others before, but it was different with Gabriel. There was no show to put on, no need to pretend to be interested or impressed with what he saw. At least with Gabriel, he didn’t have to fake a thing.

He is, though. Under his endearing school teacher clothes, Gabriel’s hiding a lot. Not surprising since he’s in law enforcement. Don’t FBI agents have to be in good shape? Dal assumed they did, so he’s not surprised. Plus, he did have the benefit of having caught a glimpse of his boyfriend without his shirt on once before. He paused to lay his hands flat against Gabriel’s chest, then smiled up at him before returning to the task at hand.

It was nice to be admired by his boyfriend who was honestly very attractive. A little on the slim side due to malnutrition but he and his mother would be able to help with that. It didn't take away from the fact that he was beautiful and Gabriel loved to look at him.

Shifting, he stepped out of his pants and let Dal take him in fully for the first time. That Dal could remember of course.

"Come here. Let's get in the shower. I can teach you how to take care of my beard since I haven't done the work for it today." And he had a couple things he needed for it in the shower which would help.

Look, he can’t help himself from taking a peek. Given how attractive he found Gabriel and already knowing he’s in good shape since that first time he saw the man without his shirt on… It wasn’t surprising that the rest of him looked strong and healthy, too. Oh, sure, he’s seen plenty of those guys who look great from the waist up but very clearly skip leg day. It didn’t seem like Gabriel was that sort at all.

He perked up at the thought of learning a way to take care of his boyfriend. “Please!” he practically chirped in excitement. Dal’s never had a beard – lack of interest in having one, himself. People wanted him to be pretty, so he leaned into that. And, well, in truth, he didn’t think he’d be able to grow a decent one even if he tried. He didn’t have to shave very often. It worked out well for him. As such, he didn’t know the first thing about caring for one and he was eager to learn from Gabriel.

Dal didn’t have any specific shower routine. Wash, shampoo, condition. Most, if not all, of his skincare regimen came after. And he didn’t do as much to care for his hair as he should, evidenced by the damage to it. That could be fixed with time and effort. And maybe a little less bleach. Maybe. Dal didn’t care for his hair when it was dark.

Following Gabriel into the shower, Dal took just a moment to admire him further. His tanned skin, his muscular frame that wasn’t bulky. Everything about him so different from Dal. Ah, but wasn’t that just another thing for Dal to find appealing? His personality was so patient and warm and Gabriel was good-looking on top that that? Dal certainly lucked out! But would he find Gabriel’s looks nearly as good if he wasn’t also just so kind and loving?

Please don’t mind him staring.

Realizing that he was being watched, he looked back to Dal and then laughed softly. Pushing his fingers through his hair, Gabriel gave him a warm smile before pulling him close to him. Gently, he pressed a kiss to his lips then tilted his head to the side. Just to admire him for a moment, enjoy that he finally was able to have moments like this without a case getting in the way of their growing feelings.

"You're very beautiful, Dal. I hope I don't disappoint you in return." Oh Gabriel knew he wasn't unfortunate to look at, he did try to keep himself maintained and in shape. But there was something about Dal that was just so unearthly in his beauty. He knew he didn't compare to that.

He didn't even want to try to.

"Though, I imagine with how you're enjoying the view that I must appeal to you," he said with a little laugh.

When Gabriel pulled him close, Dal rested his hands against his chest and melted into his arms. And also into that warm kiss. It was such a strange and wonderful thing! A lot of people didn’t want to kiss him and the ones who did, well, it was usually heated and with expectation. There was none of that from Gabriel. Only affection, which is what made it so different, so very welcome.

It almost made him feel shy. To be seen as a person, to be admired like that! It was all so amazing!

Sliding his hands up over Gabriel’s chest, along the sides of his neck, Dal cupped his face and smiled at him so fondly. “Nothin’ about you disappoints me.” How could it? Gabriel’s so kind and loving and so very, very handsome. It’s all Dal can do to keep from swooning everytime he sees him.

“You’re so special to me, Gabriel. I hope ya know that.”

"I'm really glad because you are so special to me too, Dal."

He smiled warmly at him and pressed a kiss to his lips again then stepped back to guide them more under the spray. "Show me how to take care of you and then I'll show you how to take care of my facial hair."

To start with though, he carefully moved his fingers through that hair to ensure that he started to get it wet. That would have to be the first step, he was sure of it. "I did wash your hair last night if that helps you any."

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CW: UNHEALTHY FAMILY STUFF

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